The Psychological Impact of Divorce on Kids
Divorce isn’t easy. And, when children are involved, it can be even harder. That’s because divorce impacts most kids psychologically — no matter how peaceful the divorce is. There are things you can do to minimize the impact of divorce on your kids' mental health. Let’s jump in with some ways divorce can impact your child or teen and what you can do to help them cope.
The Psychological Impact of Divorce
Divorce can be stressful for any kid. In fact, the psychological impact of this event can vary depending on a variety of factors, such as how amicable the divorce is and the age of the child. Some children don’t exhibit any psychological problems. But, others have many issues. Here are some of the possible ways that a divorce may affect a child.
Trauma
Divorce can be traumatic for children, and it may trigger an adjustment disorder or stress response syndrome. An adjustment disorder can occur after a child or adult experiences an extremely stressful event. High-conflict divorces may even lead to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms in kids.
Anxiety
Divorce can be a significant stressor for kids as it may upheaval their lives in many ways. This can cause anxiety and worry. Younger children may show signs of separation anxiety. They may cry when it’s time to go to school or be away from you.
Anger
It’s not uncommon for children — especially teenagers, to experience anger or resentment when their parents are going through a divorce. They may act out, become more rebellious or make angry comments. Some kids take the side of one parent and may express anger towards the other one.
Depression
Depression is common among kids of divorced parents. Sometimes signs of depression are hard to spot in kids. They don’t always present in the same way as they do in adults. Kids who are depressed may exhibit anger, isolation, low self-esteem, and have problems with academics.
Risky Behavior
Teenagers, in particular, are more likely to cope with divorce by engaging in risky behaviors like drug use, impulsive behavior, and sexual activity. The best thing that parents can do is to look out for these types of behaviors.
Helping Your Kids Cope
The above symptoms and behaviors are concerning, but they don’t have to leave lasting damage. There are many things you can do to offer a sense of stability for your kids and help them cope. They will appreciate your efforts.
Co-Parent Peacefully
If possible, try to manage conflict with your ex in a healthy way. Parental conflict can be very detrimental to your child or children’s mental health. Don’t criticize or bad-mouth the other parent. Also, don’t argue with them in front of your child.
You have many years of co-parenting ahead with your ex-spouse. Mediation can help you co-parent more peacefully by facilitating healthy communication and conflict resolution.
Maintain Healthy Relationships
Make sure you work on maintaining a positive relationship with your child(ren). Strive for positive, open communication. Pay attention to your child’s feelings and empathize with them. Be ready to help your child get through this tough time.
Teach Coping Skills
Help your child weather the divorce by teaching them coping skills. Encourage them to find healthy ways to manage stress. For older children, that might be practicing mindfulness or breathing exercises. Younger children might be encouraged to go outside to play or do something else they enjoy. Also, encourage your child to talk to trusted adults about their feelings.
Take Care of Yourself
Getting a divorce is a stressful time. It’s important to take care of yourself during this time. Seek support and find ways to relax. This will help you get through this tough time, and allow you to be more present for your kids.
Consider Professional Help
If your child’s mental health seems very affected by your divorce, it’s important to reach out to a mental health professional for support. Therapy can help children and teens who are experiencing severe emotional distress.
The Takeaway
For kids and teens, divorce can bring uncertainty and changes. They may feel like everything is out of their control and struggle with their mental health.
There are many things that you can do to better support your children through a divorce, including seeking counseling, as well as enlisting the help of a professional mediator to help you have a less contentious divorce. A mediator can help protect your kids from the worst parts of a divorce. You can take the first step today by scheduling a free consultation.
