How To Prepare for Divorce Mediation

If you and your partner have decided to work with a mediator to navigate your divorce, you're probably wondering how to best prepare. By gathering relevant documents and understanding what to expect, you can decrease your anxiety and help the process flow smoothly.

Find the Right Mediator To Work With

It's important to locate an experienced and well-trained divorce mediator. They will be vital in facilitating your discussions with your partner so you can reach an agreement on as many issues as possible. A mediator is a neutral third party who guides the conversation, ensures both parties have a chance to speak and helps you explore potential solutions. They should remain empathetic and impartial throughout the process. Importantly, you should also feel comfortable discussing the issues surrounding your divorce with them.

Prepare for Mediation With a Healthy Mindset

Setting clear goals and adopting a healthy mindset are essential in mediation preparation. It allows you to take control of the process and ensures that you can effectively address your needs and concerns. There are several questions to ask yourself before you get started:

• What issues are most important to you?

• What is most important to your partner?

• What is important to other people your divorce will impact (such as your children)?

• What happens if you cannot agree?

Mediation is a negotiation process with your partner, and you should prepare to be flexible where you can. Refrain from approaching mediation with the idea that you will get everything you want. Think about potential counterproposals and understand that the more you can agree on during meditation, the less you will worry about fighting these issues in court.

Consider Every Potential Topic

Property and asset division is a large part of mediation. Some things people may argue over during divorce can include:

• Wedding gifts

• Boats and ski equipment

• Photographs, heirlooms and other keepsakes

• Childrens' belongings

• Furniture and appliances

• Jewelry

• Pets

Through this process, you can determine how to split these assets fairly and determine child and spousal support payments. Make sure you locate all the proper paperwork regarding income, assets and expenses. Having this information in front of you can help you propose workable solutions and reach fair conclusions.

Create a List of Important Topics To Discuss

Anything that prevents a smooth progression of divorce is an appropriate topic of discussion. Some of the most common points that will arise include:

• Child custody

• Spousal support

• Houses and rentals

• Assets

Remember, you should not go to mediation if you have a grudge or a bone to pick with your spouse. If emotions are still high regarding the end of your marriage, then mediation may not be the right choice for you. While it's normal to feel hurt during the divorce process, you cannot let your emotions impact the choices you make or your attitude. Stay focused on your goals, and when things get challenging, ask yourself if you'd rather spend more time and money battling things out in court.

Practice What You Want To Say

Even if you know what you want, gathering your thoughts or explaining your stance during a mediation meeting can be challenging. Consider these issues and determine what you want to say before your meeting. You can even write your statement out and practice it.

Mediation meetings are usually lengthy, and you're often seated around a conference table. Ensure you get ample sleep the night before so you're ready to talk. Try to eat a well-balanced meal, so you have the energy to meet with your spouse and the mediator calmly.

Remember To Prioritize Your Children's Needs

Before everything else, your children should always come first. Mediation is much less stressful for children than a contentious court case. Your children will experience less stress if they see that their parents can still communicate with each other about important issues, especially regarding their well-being. Remember to work towards an outcome that will make them feel safe and loved.

While divorce mediation may require some preparation, it's less stressful than pursuing a traditional divorce through court. If you and your spouse can work together towards an amicable divorce, mediation can simplify your transition to the next chapter of your life. If you're ready to begin, contact Haas Mediation today. Schedule a free phone consultation, and we can discuss any questions you may have about the process so you can move forward with confidence.