Four Tips for an Amicable Divorce

Nobody goes into marriage with an expectation of failure. However, the reality is that about 43 percent of marriages will end in divorce. While divorce is arguably one of the most stressful events you can experience, you can divorce your partner with dignity and make your split as smooth as possible without things turning ugly. In fact, it's important to try to separate on amicable terms, especially if you are transitioning to a co-parenting relationship. Following are several helpful tips for a peaceful divorce so you can move on without the drama.

Learn How To Communicate With Each Other

While you're navigating the emotional and legal processes of divorce, you still have to maintain some communication about logistics, child custody, parenting, property division and other issues. There are some things you can do to establish healthy communication habits going forward. First, set boundaries and decide which communication channels you will use, whether through text, email, phone or in person. Stick to whichever guidelines you decide upon.

Remain solution-focused whenever you communicate with your ex-spouse and try to understand each other's perspective when possible. Along the way, there will undoubtedly be topics that are difficult for you to come to a fair agreement on. In these situations, a helpful avenue to explore is divorce mediation. During divorce mediation, a trained and neutral third-party mediator can facilitate difficult discussions and help you identify your needs, wishes and interests while moving forward. You can also explore options and negotiate terms as you work toward a mutually satisfactory agreement.

Practice Self Care and Compassion Throughout the Process

Your physical and mental health are important. Taking care of yourself during difficult times is not an act of selfishness. When you forget to tend to your needs, you aren't able to take care of others who may depend on you, such as your children. Investing in your well-being benefits you and those around you. Maintain your friendships outside your divorce, as they are critical as you build your support network while navigating this new chapter in your life. These friends can provide emotional support, practical advice and a sense of normalcy during this time.

Eat healthy and try to stick to a regular exercise routine. Exercise is a great way to alleviate the stress that naturally comes with divorce, and when you eat a well-balanced diet, you feel better, too. Also, give yourself plenty of time to rest and make sure you're getting enough sleep. A crucial part of self-care is self-compassion. Give yourself time to adjust and provide yourself with the same level of understanding as you would a friend going through a divorce.

Step Away From Negative Emotions and Let Go of Anger

While shock, guilt and grief are common emotions felt throughout the divorce process, another big emotion is anger. Anger can shield you from the vulnerable feelings lying just under the surface, and you may rapidly cycle through each emotion as you come to terms with your new reality. When you carry around anger, it hurts you more than the person you are angry at. When you remain bitter and unable to focus on the bigger picture, you miss opportunities to heal emotionally and experience inner growth. While it is difficult to forget the hurt you experienced as a result of your marriage ending, forgiveness can release the burdens of anger and pain that you may still carry so you can move on.

Consider Therapy To Sort Through Your Feelings

Divorce is a challenging time for your family. You can benefit from talking with a therapist to help you adjust to the changes and deal with your emotions. Individual therapy can help you learn how to identify, process and leave your negative emotions behind. During these sessions, you can safely express your anger while learning new skills to manage it. Therapists can also help you reflect on what happened in your marriage so you can avoid repeating any negative patterns in future relationships. Although divorce is a difficult life event, you can take this opportunity to redefine who you are and the kind of life you'd like to live.

Choose An Experienced And Compassionate Divorce Mediator

If you're seeking a calm and nonadversarial divorce process, schedule a consultation with Haas Mediation. Our expert mediation services can guide you through your divorce, saving you time and money. With our help, you can navigate your divorce with confidence, knowing that you're making the best decisions for everyone involved. Schedule a free consultation today to learn more about how our exceptional mediation services can help you achieve the amicable divorce you are hoping for.